" I was found by those who did not seek Me"

 "I was found by those who did not seek Me"
This time I thought it would be good to write down my testimony. How did I came to know the Lord?
It all started about 18 years ago. All my high school I was mainly interested in sport and science that was my favorite thing to do, jogging, javelin throwing and all that fun that had to do with light athletics.  At that time no interest for God, besides knowing that some God exists but I wasn't really thinking about Him. So I did athletics in my free time and I decided I will be PE teacher. Physics seemed to hard to study but doing sport all your life seemed fun. But when it came to applying to the college in that specific area of sport- I wasn't accepted because I did not do  to well  in swimming and gymnastics. I  remember I got C  in that while there were people who got A in all the parts of the exam.  I had to find somebody to blame for that...I wondered why God wouldn't let me do something I really liked. I wasn't happy at all at that time I thought I would  have to wait one more year to apply again to that school, but meanwhile a friend told me about a new German college to which exams were  in September.Then a thought came to me; let's study German for a year - to 'kill' the waiting time-and then I will go back to my sport!
And my journey started. On the first day at the new college  we were  all waiting  to take the German exam.
You would see the nervous students  reading their notes  and a girl  next to me  reading the Bible...! Well, I was reading my notes all stressed up, while that girl completely relaxed reading her book...I asked her
 'Does it help?' Then I heard all the lecture about Jesus. I  though I had never met in my life a person that religious!   All her story didn't seem to be interesting to me- I even thought she was really weird- crazy religious!  Then she shared with me two Bible verses, I have never heard before.
 They completely disturbed my peace!
 "Not everyone who says  to Me;Lord Lord shall  enter the Kingdom of Heaven but he who does the will of my Father in heaven." Matthew 7;21
First of all I realized I might be one of those people since  I had  no clue whether I  was doing the will of the Father in heaven or not.
I  heard the right words  to notice that  a Christian is not about only attending a church once a while.
It is about doing God's will which is believing in the One He sent ( Jesus) and trusting His words. But because  God  seemed  so unknown  to me  at  that time  I thought  that living for Him was good  when  you are old  but not as a student who has completely different things on mind ..'How do you know when you will die?'  I heard the question. Then it will be too late. I  imagined myself  when  God is recalling  that day when I could   hear His words from the Bible  and I was rejecting them, I was rejecting Him and the life!
Then we read the following  verse;"He who rejects Me, and does not receive my words, has that which judges him,the word that I have spoken will judge him in the last day." John 12;48
 I realized the words were telling the truth and if God says something it must be true.
How shocking it was for me to hear all these words, that I had to change my life, that Christian is a follower of Christ. It didn't seem  easy  'jumping' into ' following Christ' right away.
 I didn't want to. I had some other dreams  and thinking too much about God didn't seem too comfortable. I thought  God was too distant like  in church, with lots of pictures, statues, you pray but they never speak to you. Because I imagined God like that, I didn't have interest in thinking about Him
What was left it was  struggling with the thoughts 'I have to do God's will  to be saved'
 'Is reading the Bible for 15 minutes a day quite enough"?  I wandered. I was struggling like that  for half of the year, those 2 Bible verses  were following me everywhere.... my mind couldn't get rid of them. The only 'relief ' was giving lessons to the kids when I had to focus on teaching the language, but as soon as the lesson was over, the words from the Bible  came back and  the question' Have you made up your mind?"

This became  a really heavy burden on my heart; how much is it enough to be a Christian? What is His will every day? How can I be sure I am saved? How much of reading  the Bible is enough to be called a Christian? Then I spontaneously prayed to God simply saying that I was tired of that burden that  I didn't know what His will was  but I wanted to do it and that  and that I wanted Him to be my Lord!
That was very unusual because after that simple prayer at home I started to have peace in my heart that I haven't had for a long time. Such a relief as if somebody took of a big load of something from my heart. It seemed to me like Somebody there above heard me!
I started testing myself, even saying that I was not interested in reading ' boring Bible' didn't take away my peace. Then I realized I actually have an interest to read it. As I read that day I came across these words; John 14;27 " Peace I leave with you, my peace I give to you, not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid."  Wow, that's exactly as if I was reading about myself; I just experienced  that peace! I  knew  the Bible is true, the words are telling the truth! God is real!
I felt like being born again, seeing everything in a new light, God didn't seem distant and unknown any more. My heart wasn't accusing me .Each time I read the Bible  it was confirming everything what I experienced. Jesus said;" You search the scriptures, for in them you think  you have eternal life; and these are they that testify of Me. But you are not willing to come to Me  that you may have life." John 5;39-40
So it was the same with me, reading  the Bible without coming to God didn't mean anything, I thought that  just by reading I would be a real believer  but  that wasn't giving me any peace until I prayed.  I decided to come to God like the above verse says. That is when God responded and I knew  I was saved. My favorite verse became John 5;24 " Most assuredly I say to you , he who hears my word and  and believes in Him who sent Me, has everlasting life, and shall not come into judgement, but has passed from death into life."  We have forgiveness of sin in Jesus, that's why by trusting Him we can have peace in our heart.
Now it is hard to imagine living without God.  "I have come that they may have life, and that they may have it more abundantly." John 10;10 That is what it means to live with God and have Him as your Lord. Second you have promise that you have eternal life. " I am the resurrection and the life, he who believes in Me, though he may die, he shall live." John 11;25
The Bible is full of so many great promises but if we don't have any access to them  or we decide to ignore them,we  choose to live a hopeless life. As it is said;" Man shall not live  by bread alone, but by every word that proceeds from the mouth of God."
I finished my German college, I didn't care too much about coming back to sport, my interests changed and I went to the Bible school in Hungary  for 2 years. I remember my friends saying' I would find no job if I didn't finish my German degree( because I went to the Bible school) and then after I finished my Bible school - the job 'called me' offering the  job  as a teacher in one of the private language schools. So  meanwhile I  also finished my last 2 years of German to get my final degree. My worries weren't needed, God was in control;
 " Seek first the Kingdom of God, and all the things shall be added unto you." I 'experience' it all the time.